♥_= m A e =_♥

Sneezing Signs....

2008-06-11T04:54:00.000-07:00

MORNING
6:31-7:00 You will love a friend soon
7:01-7:30 Bad illness will come
7:31-8:00 Someone is mad at you
8:01-8:30 A good person will come to you
8:31-9:00 Someone is longing foe you
9:01-9:30 A good luck for a day
9:31-10:00 Your friend trust you
10:01-10:30 He’s got a girlfriend already
10:31-11:00 He likes you
11:01-11:30 You will meet a wonderful person
11:31-12:00 He/she loves you
12:01-12:30 Don’t open your heart to anyone else
12:31-1:00 He/she is thinking for you

AFTERNOON
1:01-1:30 Your friend is faithful
1:31-2:00 He’s/she’s only playing with your emotions
2:01-2:30 A disappointment will come
2:31-3:00 An invitation will come
3:01-3:30 He/she wants to be with you
3:31-4:00 A trouble will come
4:01-4:30 A fulfillment of a dream
4:31-5:00 A day of special date
5:01-5:30 You can’t trust your friend
5:31-6:00 An expected ill will come

EVENING
6:01-6:30 Your going to marry her/him soon
6:31-7:00 A cancellation
7:01-7:30 Someone is thinking of you
7:31-8:00 A lucky day
8:01-8:30 Someone is loving you secretly
8:31-9:00 He/she is making friends with you
9:01-9:30 Something nice is going to happen
9:31-10:00 He/she comes as luck for you
10:01-10:30 You will have a special date
10:31-11:00 A lovely person will come
11:01-11:30 Just forget him/her
11:31-12:00 He/she is dreaming of you
12:01-12:30 An unexpected will come
12:31-1:00 He/she talks to others about you

DAWN
1:01-1:30 You will receive something unexpected
1:31-2:00 You will meet him/her soon
2:01-2:30 Someone wants to meet you
2:31-3:00 You will receive a gift
3:01-3:30 He/she is jealous
3:31-4:00 He/she doesn’t love you, he’s/she’s just playing
4:01-4:30 He/she is shy to tell his/her secrets
4:31-5:00 A good news will come
5:01-5:30 He/she loves you but he/she doesn’t need you
5:31-6:00 Don’t be near to him/her, he/she will do something
6:01-6:30 He/she loves you but shy to tell

This is true. One of the signs here already happens to me. Just try. It’s fun.

Know me first...

2008-06-11T04:51:00.000-07:00

Some people may not understand the way I am. Some people will hate the things I do. Some people may misunderstand the things I say, the way I look, the way I act, the way I communicate to others. Sometimes I think that I don’t belong here. This is their world and not mine. I’m just breathing the air that surrounds them.

It’s hard to face the people who don’t like you. It’s hard to communicate with them when something is running on their minds. It’s difficult to make friends with them even though I know that they don’t even want too. But everyday in my life, I try to make things go right. I know some of them criticize me. But I can’t do anything if that was their thinking of.

Someone told me that some of her friends, some of our classmates, some of the groups in school don’t like me. I’m really shocked when she told me about it. I can’t move my head to look her and even single words won’t come out from my mouth. I just can’t believe that she makes friends with me but she doesn’t like me. She said they don’t like the way I look at them. That she knows that my close friends are criticizing me too. But I know, she just old me about it because she doesn’t know who really I am.

After that day, I ask my 2 friends if they don’t like me. They say, “we like you Mae. We really like the way you are”. I told them that I think I need to change so that everybody will like me. They say, “If you will change everything, you will never be the Mae we’ve know. You don’t need to change just for them. It’s you; it’s the Mae we love. They just don’t know you that much that’s why they are telling you that stupid things”. They are actually right. I don’t need to change. It’s not for them why I live for. My world doesn’t revolve just for them. My world is just revolving for my family and for all my friends who really cares for me. I know what I’m doing anyway. As long I know that I have friends who will stop me if everything goes wrong.

I know that some of the words that come out from my mouth will hurt someone. Like what I’ve told my friend. (Not to mention) but I myself know that it’s my mistake. I really admit it. But it’s true. It’s for her sake. She’s still angry with me until now. But I’m really hoping that she will understand what I really mean. For all the people who don’t like me, I know that you know who you are, one thing I want to say, “Know me first before judging me”. I’m just being myself. I’m not pretending. If you don’t like me my attitude, it’s your problem not mine. As what I’ve said, “If you can’t handle my worst, then you don’t deserve my best”.

I made the worLd beLieve....

2008-06-11T04:46:00.000-07:00

I made the world believe that I’m happy, strong, a fighter, and a survivor. But how long will I have to act like a perfect happy person if deep inside I’m totally broken.

They always ask me if I do encounter some problems. They asked about it because if I am in front of them, I made everything so funny, so happy. I do like to act happy, a strong person in front of them because I don’t want them to know that I’m weak inside. I told them some of my problems but I say it s a joke. Because I don’t want them to problem my problems. I want everything to be natural. Even though it’s hard to pretend that I’m strong.

Even though in my family, I used to hide my problems to them. But only my mom can noticed it. Only my mom can understand what I’m going through. But even to my mom, I never try to tell everything. I have many friends, but I know, no one can help me carry my burdens. I know sometimes, no one can understand me. But it’s my way to pretend that I’m ok. I can face my problems but if my problems are my relatives, I think I can’t do anything. Now a day, there are some conflicts between my family and my relatives. I really don’t know how to solve it because even me is part of the conflict. I’m hurt when I heard the bad things that my aunt, my cousins told. My mom is really strong and maybe I’m like her. But now, I don’t care what will happen between my relatives and my family. Who cares? Its there fault, not ours. For me, a little thing that includes my family makes me broken.